Handling Silence

Learn to handle the silence of others and learn/practise to be in silence and be alone.

I have been at times where the person I have been working has not responded to my communication for days and has gone in silent mode. This gave rise to uncertainty in me. Why was I not comfortable with silence? I wanted to get things done or wanted to get ready made solutions from some one and silence never provided answers as I was not looking for answers I knew as I feared the silence or had the temptation to fill in the silence.  We all have learnt that silence is a feedback and we need to work on that. Is our learning a fact or a thought? Let us figure it out for ourselves. Today I read this article “How to Handle Silence, the Worst Kind of Feedback” and the mentioned 3 steps made a lot of sense to me.

  • Acknowledge to yourself that you don’t know what the silence means. Resist the temptation to fill in the blank. May be the other person is providing you more time to make you more self aware, which does not happen when you are trying to put your efforts to break the silence.
  • Admit to the other person that you don’t know what the silence means. Ask him to fill in the blank. Ask once and Ask twice and if there is real feedback he  might share with you. 
  • No matter what he says, act as if it’s the truth. If you get an answer you don’t believe, pretend you believe it anyway.