This is in continuation to blog Handling Silence. Some more experiences and some more learning’s
There is a person that I developed good relationship for quite some time. We separated in our relationship based on some incompatibilities and there has been a long silence. I respect him and have regards for him and I am sure he has respect and treats me the same. At times I keep trying to find the meaning for this silence. Do i need to forget the relationship? I take initiative and tried to connect with him and felt that the response was neutral. I keep contemplating whether the other person is not interested in the relationship with me any more.
I work with a person and he responds sometimes immediately and never responds to my emails at times. Some times I feel very odd, when emails or voicemails go unanswered. I call him and talk to him, but still feels odd that there was no response. How long should I retry? I am also getting angry that why he is not responding. I need to put a mental model in my head as follows.
- Let me not take the reaction of other person on personal basis. the person may have other priorities based on today’s needs
- Let me reduce pestering with follow-up emails or calls, The time he has got today is to respond to crises and top priorities and mine was not one of them
- Manage my emotions. The best thing is to assume that he will not come back. This will help me not to waste my energy stressing about it.
I work with a colleague in a lot of learning activities, have healthy discussions about technology and community issues. We have found our frequency matches and our relationship has been joyful. But once fine day, he decides to part with the organization and you become little stresses because your same frequency relationship is drifting away and that interactions is going to go more in to silent mode..I need to put a mental model in my head
- May be you get a different perspective to things, which can help you in your thought process.
- Relationship is still around,a little more effort is need and you can understand the true value of the relationship.
- Building relationship is with you.
Do not fear Silence and learn/practise to be in silence and be alone