In last month, I learnt that not managing expectations have bogged me down. This is true at my start-up, at my home and at my investments. I have been trying to ignore or control expectations. I have realized that it is important to handle expectations. This includes expectations on myself and expectations on others. One is also responsible for the expectations that others can have on us. Then I started looking at have I learnt earlier how to manage expectations earlier in my life.
Parents dream of things that children will achieve, sometimes what they have not achieved. School life is cut throat competition and there are exams and grades and comparisons. The school student is made to feel that yo need to achieve to have a life, else you are lost the race. What can be done about this school period? May be I do not set lot of expectations on my children. The children are pushed that they can learn something that they do not like with a lot of hard work . No one is ready to spend time to understand why it is hard for child to learn. Parents are worried when their children are not able to grasp some times. The child is pushed to the stage of cribbing “I am not getting it. What do you expect me to do?” Can we see what expectations are set for children? You join a job and there is a lot of expectation you keep on yourself like growing in your career and earning more salary. You compare with some one else who was your batch mate and you run your life on unstable human emotions.
I have never written down my own expectations. I have never measured where I am with my expectation and not aware of the accomplishments and failures specifically. I know them superficially.I have not also identified the expectations that does not suit my living style and looked at whether I have choice to change the expectation? If I have see whether my own expectations are met or not, it is quite possible 80 to 90 percent is accomplished and we focus too much on remaining ten percent and lose the other contexts in life. Is it possible to satisfy every expectations all time? No
Some tips to handle expectations.
- Prioritize what I actually want to do in life. Let me be as specific as possible. Write down all tasks done in my life and measure the same and be aware of what I have accomplished. You cannot manage expectations unless you measure them
- Align your expectations with your family expectations or work hard to align family expectations with yours. Be realistic in managing expectations.On-way expectations never work in life. Acknowledge the impact of your limitations not to be disappoint later.
- Expectations should be motivation factor in life and not detrimental factor. Expectations cannot drive your life. Enjoy what have been accomplished. I do not feel happy about accomplishments as i always keep looking at next underachieved expectation.